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Old 01-04-2005   #1
psychoDiablo
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The ladies should like this one

wrote it about 2 or 3 years ago. while at work. (stupid medical records) *sorry the indentation is too hard to pull off on this shit. i've got the 5 spaces down but it automatically aligns it to the left. piece of crap. this would definately look better with indents*

He came home from his day-off and rushed to his room. He flung open the door, took off his hat, and started to change clothes.
"Hope it's a good night." He said. He went to the mirror and looked at himself. "Hmm..." he wondered, "Yea that's down." Walked into the bathroom and started combing his hair, the phone rang.
"Hello."
"Hi, is Xavier there?"
"Nope. Yea, I don't know where he is. You wouldn't know if that fool happened to go down there did he?"
"Umm, no I don't think so."
"Yea, I don't know where he's at then. Sorry. I'll let him know you called."
"Okay, thank you. Bye."
"Late." He hung up the receiver and returned to the bathroom to finish. A couple strokes to his hair, and brushes to his teeth, he was done. He admired himself in the mirror, practicing his facial moves. Squinting his left eye a tad, smiling beautiful, and tilting his head slightly to the right, he shone. A sparkle flashed off of him.
"Damn...I'm lookin good." He laughed and walked into the living room. He looked at the clock, almost time. He sat down now, feeling anxious. He stood up quickly and paced around the room.
"Shit man. I'm so nervous. What if she doesn't like me? What if she's some fat broad? Fuck man...Maybe I should cancel? Nah fuck that. Ima go through with this." His heart began to rush, his hopes heightened and at the same time he began to feel feelings of doubt and too good to be true. It crushed him. He started thinking again. "Fuck dude, I hope it goes good. my frist date. A blind one too...." He looked down at the coffee table and noticed the roses. Two white roses and a gorgeous red rose in the middle. He picked them up and examined them.
"Two white purity's meet. What's to happen of them? Shall they be let go and only to come back another day when it is remembered? Or will they instantly, for one another, fall to Earth's gravity freer, comfortably more than anyone else? It's beautiful to think the possibilities. If it's there in both of them, a sleek red rose will surely bloom." The words that flowed out his mouth, like nothing, made him feel powerful. Made him feel good. Little surprises like that always made him feel good. He smiled and stared at the roses. He started thinking about her. He liked her already. It was just cool to talk to her. The late night talking on the phone, to him it was fun and he appreciated having someone up to talk to him so late while boredom kicked in. She was cool and he liked her. And he knew that she had to have liked him. Otherwise why would she stay up so late to talk? Was she that bored? No. She did like him, and tonight was the night. He was finally going to meet her. He broke his thinking and glanced at the clock.
"Shit! Time to go." He grabbed his keys, locked the door on the way out, jumped into his car, and sped off.
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Chillin is cooperating with your surroundings, unknowing'st of what everything is capable of; and all the while, as it happens and after, to accept without any thought of good or bad, but mainly, just enjoying rather deeply, the moment you had to sit and think. (Not thinking.)

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Last edited by psychoDiablo; 01-04-2005 at 03:35 PM.
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Old 01-04-2005   #2
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Re: The ladies should like this one

"Two white purity's meet. What's to happen of them? Shall they be let go and only to come back another day when it is remembered? Or will they instantly, for one another, fall to Earth's gravity freer, comfortably more than anyone else? It's beautiful to think the possibilities. If it's there in both of them, a sleek red rose will surely bloom."

Wow, some people actually talk like this? It's pretty poetic though.

But seriously, I liked it. I think it's a little bland though. There's not much description past "He got up" and stuff like that. Maybe a bit more about his surroundings...
Also, I'm probably just being dumb, but what was the point of the phone conversation? Anyways good stuff.
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Old 01-04-2005   #3
psychoDiablo
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Re: The ladies should like this one

it was actually a day for me, that never happened....

and i dont talk like that but moreorless think that way.
usually when i'm alone, driving or whatever, comes out all the shit i wish i could write down, but i dont.
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I wouldn't say I'm psycho only because I'm able to handle it.
Now learn patience

To chill is to be chillin.
Chillin is cooperating with your surroundings, unknowing'st of what everything is capable of; and all the while, as it happens and after, to accept without any thought of good or bad, but mainly, just enjoying rather deeply, the moment you had to sit and think. (Not thinking.)

|-Mr.MCR-|

Will you write
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Life when I am gone?
You will.
by Angelina

"I have lived life as horrible as it was, and as beautiful as it has become."
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Old 01-04-2005   #4
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Re: The ladies should like this one

Yeah, that happens to me as well. Usually on the crapper though. Sods law. Or whatever.

Anyway, you should just write stuff down more often. If you think like that, then writing shouldn't be a problem!
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Old 01-04-2005   #5
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Re: The ladies should like this one

Ah it's ... good.
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Old 01-04-2005   #6
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Re: The ladies should like this one

Oh I like it, Matt Usually the stories like that are about the girl and what she's thinking, and that's boring 'cuz I already know what thats like. But it was interesting to see the guy's point of view. Did you ever finish it, or do you have any more?
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Old 01-04-2005   #7
psychoDiablo
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Re: The ladies should like this one

Quote:
Originally Said by spadetje
Oh I like it, Matt Usually the stories like that are about the girl and what she's thinking, and that's boring 'cuz I already know what thats like. But it was interesting to see the guy's point of view. Did you ever finish it, or do you have any more?

haha youre sweet. but it's finished. that's it. I would have wrote the second page, but considering I don't know what happened after he left, I couldnt write the rest.
sorry.
__________________
I wouldn't say I'm psycho only because I'm able to handle it.
Now learn patience

To chill is to be chillin.
Chillin is cooperating with your surroundings, unknowing'st of what everything is capable of; and all the while, as it happens and after, to accept without any thought of good or bad, but mainly, just enjoying rather deeply, the moment you had to sit and think. (Not thinking.)

|-Mr.MCR-|

Will you write
Will you love
Will you enjoy
Life when I am gone?
You will.
by Angelina

"I have lived life as horrible as it was, and as beautiful as it has become."
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