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Old 04-24-2003   #21
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One day a Brunett Says to a blond my husbands got dandruff problems, the blond says "so what did you do?" The Brunett says "oh I gave him head and shoulders", then the Blond says, "Wait, how do you give shoulders"?

Last edited by Liquid; 04-24-2003 at 03:29 PM.
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Old 04-24-2003   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by fadingroses
*groan* change the number of days, lol...
28 has that menstrual-cycle connotation...
Proof that we are influenced by the stars

(women anyway)
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Old 04-24-2003   #23
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liquid mate...your first joke has already been posted, check the first page on this topic.......the second ones pretty funny..lol
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Old 04-24-2003   #24
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What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?

a) Gifted

or

b) Pregnant
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Old 04-24-2003   #25
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A blonde dials 911 to report that her car has been broken
into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to
the dispatcher.

"They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the
brake pedal, and even the accelerator!" she cries.

The 911 dispatcher says, "Stay calm. An officer is on the
way. He will be there in two minutes."

Before the police get to the crime scene, however, the 911
dispatcher's telephone rings a second time, and the same
blonde is on the line again.

"Never mind," giggles the blonde, "I got in the back seat
by mistake."

thanx alot uv bin a gr8 audience!!!
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Old 04-24-2003   #26
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A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says,
"Hey, wanna hear a blond joke?"

The man says back to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blond.
The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he
is blond. The bouncer is blond. The man sitting over to your
left is also blond. Still wanna tell that blond joke?"

The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, "Nah, I
wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."

thnx agen!
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Old 04-24-2003   #27
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Quote:
Originally posted by Psychosis
liquid mate...your first joke has already been posted, check the first page on this topic.......the second ones pretty funny..lol
ah thanks Psychosis

post changed
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Old 04-24-2003   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by Weasel
Proof that we are influenced by the stars

(women anyway)


I guess I set us up for that one... lol. No wonder they call us loony.
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Old 04-24-2003   #29
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Here's a good blonde joke
Salome
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA hA HO HO HO HUM.
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Old 05-22-2003   #30
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True huh...???

How do they manage this...???
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Old 05-23-2003   #31
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just before i tell the joke, you have to know that 'the fuzz' is slang for 'the police'.

ok, here goes.

A guy walked up to a blonde and said, "have you ever been picked up by the fuzz"?

"No", she said, "but i've been swung around by the tits"

ha ha ha aaahhhhh..........maybe you had to be there : )
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Old 05-23-2003   #32
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2 Brunettes and a blonde were shipwrecked on an island 400 miles away from the nearest inhabited island, one day they decide to swim to the inhabited island, 1 brunette swims 300 miles and drowns, the other swims 350 miles and drowns, and the blonde swims 200 miles, gives up and goes back.

Its quite lame, but still, its a blonde joke
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Old 05-24-2003   #33
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I hope that everyone enjoys these.



A blonde girl has just gotten fired. Her boss has always called
her a dumb blonde.

She is driving down the road when she sees a blonde girl in the
middle of a wheat field rowing a canoe.

She pulls over, gets on the roof of her truck,and says,"IT'S
BLONDES LIKE YOU WHO GIVE BLONDES LIKE US A BAD NAME! BUT IF I
WASN'T SCARED OF WATER I'D COME OUT THERE AND KICK YOUR ASS!"

One day a Blonde walked into the doctors office with 2 red ears.
The doctor asked what happened. She said "I was ironing and the
phone rang and I picked up the iron by mistake. "What happened
to the other ear?" the doctor asked. "They called back."




A blonde is over at this Coke Machine putting fifty cents in,
taking the coke, putting it in her pockets, throwing the
quarters in, taking the coke, putting it in her pockets,
throwing the quarters in, taking the coke, putting it in her
pockets. After a while she has a coke in every pocket. She keeps
going, stacking the cokes around her on the floor. Finally, the
guy behind her, getting pissed off, asks her, "What the HECK are
you doing?!" She responds, "Duh, I'm winning."
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Old 06-01-2003   #34
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These should be good!

The Air Traffic Control Tower heard a "mayday" call from a small airplane in distress flown by a blonde. The control tower asked; "aircraft calling mayday; what is your height and your position?" The blonde replied; "I am 5'10" tall and I am sitting in the cockpit".

A blonde and a brunette are sitting in a bar and watching the 11:00 P.M. news. A man is standing on the ledge of a high-rise building, contemplating suicide. The brunette says to the blonde: "I'll bet you $20.00 that the man jumps off that building and commits suicide." The blonde thinks for a moment then replies: "OK, you're on!" They watch for a few minutes and sure enough, the man jumps off the ledge. The blonde sighs and reaches for her wallet, but the brunette stops her, saying: "I can't take your money - I feel too guilty. I have to confess that I watched the 6:00 P.M. news this evening and I knew that the man would jump. The blonde replied: "Oh! I watched the 6:00 P.M. news too, but I didn't think he'd jump off again!"

A brunette and a blonde walk into a bar, the brunette ducked.
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Old 06-03-2003   #35
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how about this ...


A redhead, a brunette, and a blond are in the ladies room of a very old theatre when the mirror begins to speak. The mirror says that it only comes out once every hundred years and that it grants noble wishes. It clarifies, "I will only grant a wish that portrays what you truly believe, if you tell one lie you will instantly disappear."

The brunette steps forward and says, "I think that all children should have enough to eat." Because the mirror knew that this is what the girl really believed in the wish was granted.

The redhead steps forward and says, "I think that there should be world peace." Because the mirror knew that this is what the girl really believed in the wish was granted.

Lastly, the blonde stepped forward and said, "Golly, I guess I think..." Whap!! she disappeared.
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Old 06-03-2003   #36
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LOL! Blonds don't "think"!?
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Old 01-21-2007   #37
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Re: Blonde jokes, anyone?

two blondes drive to florida for a vacation and see a sign that says disney World left...so they turned around and went home.

ya know what ya call 12 blondes standing side by side?..A wind tunnel

6 blondes on a merry go round...Hurricane

if you were to walk up to a blonde and wave your hand over her ear she would probably say thanks for the refill
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