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Old 09-13-2004   #1
superchicken002
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Long Distance Relationship

I have been seeing this guy off and on since the end of March. We have never officially been together, but just hooked up when we had the chance to hang out. We have, however, talked practically every single day since the day we met. I never really told him how I felt about him.

The last time we went out alone I fell head over heels for him.. I don't know how my feelings went from moderate to extreme, but they did. That night was just so perfect to me.

About two weeks ago he told me he had bad news for me... he told me that he was moving to Texas.. (13 hours away). He didn't even expect me to care. I was completely floored... So I took advantage of that moment and told him how I have been feeling (I am bad with feelings and such). He was actually glad to hear it and he told me that it was too bad that he was moving because we probably missed out on something really good. I told him that might of been possible but I dont think that it would of been so good because I knew that we were both looking for different things.. (me a relationship and him just wanting to hook up). He told me that he had been looking for a relationship and that I should of let him know I felt earlier. I felt so guilty for keeping it all in... oh well...

Saturday night (his first night there) we talked on the phone for about 4 hours. We talked about every possible thing... and he asked me if I would be willing to have a long distance relationship. Or if I would want to make him and I "official". I told him that I didn't know because I wouldnt hardly ever see him.. he told me that he would be coming back here every other weekend and on holidays and such. I don't know if Id be able to handle it but I do really care about him. I told him I wanted to think about it and he told me that he knew I was just scared... I also told him that I wasnt too scared that he'd cheat on me but the fact is that I know both of us would be tempted (I would never cheat but I know Id feel guilty for even be tempted), and he is in a whole new place he might meet someone so great. I am scared of him hurting me... I really care about him... Should I try this relationship thing out or what? Any advice??? I really dont know what to do...
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Old 09-13-2004   #2
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

if theres no point in the future where you might see each other regularly, then no.

me and my Girlfriend did the whole long distance thing, but only because it was gonna be for a year and then she'd be moving down, and we saw each other every other weekend, for the entirity of that weekend.
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Old 09-13-2004   #3
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

Yeah, we'd see each other every other weekend and holidays and such. He might be moving back in about six months but hes not sure yet.

I don't want to pursue something that has no future, but then again I don't want to not pursue it if there is a chance that it could work out wonderfully. Get what I'm saying?

Like you said, your girlfriend was going to move back in a year. That's what he is planning on doing as of the moment (if not in six months) but is not positive about it. I just don't know if I want to start a relationship on the terms that I'd only be able to see him once and awhile.

Thanks for your advice.
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Old 09-13-2004   #4
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

well, sounds to me like theres the possibility of a future. i think long distance relationships are hard, but not impossible. you should give it a try. you might have big regrets if you dont.
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Old 09-13-2004   #5
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

You could move there. But it would probably ruin your life.
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Old 09-13-2004   #6
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

If it's pretty definite that he's going to come there every other weekend and holidays, I say go for it, what's the harm in trying?

Warning, I know you know it's hard, but it may be harder than you think, too. My friend tried a long distance relationship and she said it was the hardest thing she's ever done.
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Old 09-13-2004   #7
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

A twelve hour drive every other weekend? He must really like you superchicken.
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Old 09-13-2004   #8
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

He'd be flying out.. his family lives here.

yeah, Im scared to try.
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Old 09-13-2004   #9
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

You know what this happend to me too but awhile ago. Except he moved to ontario. *sigh* we use to talk alot. Then after about Three, Four years we just dont talk anymore. occasionally every month or so, but over the internet. Hes really different. But if your willing to take a chance, do it, because youll definitly regret it later.
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Old 09-13-2004   #10
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

these things are always worth trying.

what have you got to lose but a few nights' sleep?
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Old 09-13-2004   #11
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

I was in the situation for a while cause I met this girl from edmonton and she was the best person I have ever met and I live about 5 hrs away so we thought about a long distance thing but I just thought I myaswell wait the 2 years until I move down to edmonton

I know this dosn't help but I thought it was a good story... and really if you think about it... lets say you do have a relationship and it dosn't work out... there arn't many cons to that but if you do have a relationship with him and it does work out then it would be awsome... I say yes because in my eyes the pros weigh out the cons
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Old 09-13-2004   #12
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Re: Long Distance Relationship

i've been in a few long distance relationships, because (duh) i suck, but the main thing is, they don't work, you can kid yourself for a while, but in the end, it will crumble, unless you KNOW he is coming back to live, and that it's definate. Otherwise you're kidding yourself, I mean geez, you're 17 for christs sake, and he seems like a prick anyway! just... if you choose to be with him, be very bloody careful about it because honestly, it won't work, and you'll just end up getting hurt when it ends...
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