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Old 05-13-2003   #1
SummerSun
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Im Crushed

I feel like a part of me is being ripped out, this might sound ridiculous and u might all think i am crazy, but I found out my boyfriend is probably going away to college next year, and I haven't taken the news to well, he told me about a week ago and I guess it took a few days to hit me, but now it's so hard for me to see him, cause when I do, it just makes me sad, I know that even if he does go we will still have another 3 months together, but I don't know if things can be the same between us, I just keep thinking about how this is ending, and I told him I feel like I have to let go, but I don't want too, we haven't really spoken to much about this because it's so hard, so I don't know what he wants, if he wants to stay together, break up or try the long distance thing, Im just so sad about this, Im not the type that crys at all, but 2 outta the last 3 times I saw him I couldn't help but just break down. I don't know what to think or what to do, I just needed to get this out, thats all.
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Old 05-14-2003   #2
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If you want to have any hope of a relationship at all the key is going to be good communication. You HAVE to work up the courage to sit him down and talk to him about it to see what he wants and what you want.

What's the age difference between you and how far away is he going to college?
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Old 05-14-2003   #3
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K - Weasel is right. Communication is the "life" to any good relationship. If it's "meant to be" it will happen, but right now you have to enjoy every moment that you spend together.

Life is way too short not to live every second to the fullest.

I'm so sorry that you are broken up about this. Relationships are the toughest part of life for a lot of people.

Take care, and don't feel bad if you need to cry - that's a normal part of life too and sometimes it does help...

V
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Old 05-14-2003   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by Weasel


What's the age difference between you and how far away is he going to college?
We are about a year apart, he's almost 20 and im almost 19 and he is gonna go about 8 hours away.


V-Thanks for the sympathy
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Old 05-14-2003   #5
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You need to talk.
I'm 18, a senior, and staying in state for collage(at least a year)...and then possibly going out of state. My boyfriend(who I'm engaged to) is 17, and a junior. He is planning on going to West Point...and I live in Nevada. That is an extremely long distance. But, after lots of talking, planning, promising and understanding we have decided we WILL work through all our problems...no mater how hard things get. We have decided not to change our goals in life, but to instead work our lives into those goals. West Point won't accept you if your married, so we even have to hold off on that...for around 5-years. At first we were both a little freaked out and worried.
But, when we sat and talked about how we would deal with it...it made things easier. We talked of things we'll do when we are lonely, so we don't even think of turning to a new companion. The main thing is trust, above all you MUST have that trust...and communication. :)
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Old 05-14-2003   #6
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I'v never lost anyone in a non-viloent way.
Although I have never touched a woman in anger.

But after being married for 17 yrs I have laerned 2 very inmortant things..

The others alredy covered the first one.. Communation.

The second is sipmly, All thing constantally change.
Weither or not you two stay together in the long run is determined by how you react to the changes in your life.
However, you do have some control on where these changes take you. Always head in the direction you feel is best and use every oppoturinty (good or bad) to direct you toward your ultimate goals.
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Old 05-14-2003   #7
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You can't expect a relationship to include being around your SO (significant other) 24/7. There will always be times that you two wiill be apart, and that's totally unavoidable.

my boyfriend once told me this: if two people really want a relationship to work, then they'll make it work. do you really want this? I'm sure you do, even though you don't know if he doesn't. you HAVE to talk to him, because bottling it inside will kill you. seriously. and that hurts more than swallowing pride and telling him. take the advice of a nike commercial and just do it. you really have nothing to lose now, and maybe he feels the same way you do.

good luck =)
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Old 05-15-2003   #8
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Thanks everyone for all the advice, support, and sympathy. Especially for the great advice, Finally last night we talked about this, it was really hard, but he insisted that I tell him everything that I am thinking about this so I did. I feel a lot better though now that I told him about how I felt, I don't feel as sad about this whole situation cause he reasurred me of how much he loves me and how hard it is for him too and he doesn't even really wanna go, but he thinks it will be the best for him career wise.
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Old 05-15-2003   #9
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It's hard in todays world to find a guy that loves you and wants to be with you as much as you love and want to be with them. Some people are lucky and find their guy right away. Some of us have to deal with heart ache and everything that comes with it. I know I'm thanking my lucky stars that I took the time to talk to a guy and meet him and get to know him. He's everything I want and need in a guy.

Keep your head up, your kisses soft yet full, and your hugs tight....but not TOO tight. You don't want his head to pop off.
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