How come I allways feel like I don't fit in?

[TelexII]

So far it seems every where I go I just don't seem to fit with the people for exsample I went to a soccer camp a while back and made no new friends and I tryed hard to be friendly but I still didn't fit in...So what am I doing wrong? :depressd:

[krad]

Maybe you were trying too hard, and as a result came off fakey.

[Gerbil 01]

I find the easiest way to make friends is to NOT go out of your way to find them. People sometimes get curious when you act like you have no need for them. Some people can't stand that and go and talk with you just so you won't ignore them anymore. Just kinda give them the feeling that THEY are the one's "out of place" or "don't fit in." I've never really gone out of my way to make friends because I grew up in the military and friends were pretty much useless at that point in my life. Just about the time I made a friend, I lost them because we either had to move, or they had to move.

Just be cool, mind your own business, and let them come to you, then when they do, open up and try to build a friendship. It's the easiest way. Then if they don't want anything to do with you anymore, you can look on the bright side of things and realize that they came looking for you instead of the other way around. :rolleyes:

[makilwen]

I'm just curious as to why you want to fit in. Be yourself and if people don't accept you, why would you want those people as friends? And girls are notorious assholes about leaving their cliques to make new friends. *shrug*

[TelexII]

Actully what I mean is I don't feel like I'm blinding in. Instead I feel invisable. And it gives me an akward outsider feeling. Which is most displeasing. :ermm:

[NOREGRETS]

Feeling outta place is no big deal ya...everyone must have had similiar experience in one or other point of life .. but extrapolating that to the rest of the life will make your life miserable ....also its important not to compare... like he/she has become more popular than u ... just try to mingle and do it not with an attitudet that everyone should remember you after that .... just enjoy yourself in such situations...and do it sincerely...

[Sharker]

Ahhh, just ignore it. Youll either get used to it, or people will notice you later on, and youll blend in more ^.^

[stranger]

ya ...it is as simple as that ....dont bother too much

[INCUBUS]

Originally posted by TelexII
Actully what I mean is I don't feel like I'm blinding in. Instead I feel invisable. And it gives me an akward outsider feeling. Which is most displeasing. :ermm:


Don't try to blend in. Just be yourself ( the only thing you can be).
Why try to fit in? I don't fit in with everyone and I don't really give a shit. Either you like me or you don't, but I'm certainly not out to live my life to please other people in hope that they'll like me.

[Tight as a Virgin]

I know what u mean, Telex, from the point of view that every1, however non-conformist or "don't care" their attitude is, appreciates a confidante from time to time. I agree with earlier comments re. not appear false or desperate; no1 likes a clingy loser! you seem quite sorted and nice from ur comments on here...does anyone from A.S. live near you? try doing some social activities in clubs etc, u can meet some really interesting people.

My final word has to be; some of my best friends are nothing like me and we get on great. broaden ur horizons and realise that "not fitting in" to a particular group can be a blessing in disguise, as u don't get complacent and stick with the same few mates and thereby possibly miss out on other friendships with people whose path you might not cross in some circumstances.

[razmella]

Just be yourself dont try to fit in if u find a bunch of friends then so be it. Trust me i know what your going through i had only 1 friend in 9th grade. i wasnt acting like myself though Than i got over my shyness now i talk to everyone i dont know...if i dont know someone ill be like "I dont know u my name is rachael" thats how i made most of my friends...I would also go to a music hang out place where u like the music there.. I have found alot of my friends at school go to the hang out place i go to... and try to make friends there i made friends and found out they go to my school lol.... But yea just be yourself dont care about what others think it helps alot...

[dj]

A lot of people who hang out in groups aren't worth your time anyway. You start running into people who expect you to conform to their ideas. If you wear a shirt that's isn't the latest thing, someone dumps on you for not buying a new wardrobe every year. If you like certain bands, they dump on you for listening to crap, which means you get stuck listening to their stuff which you'll probably think is crap.

Find one or two people who seem comfortable around you and see if you can be comfortable around them. Then value what you find.

[SkOoKiE SpRiTe]

just be yerself... and don't worry about blending... and try first to be happy with where you are... the first step to advancement is to realize and truly appreciate where you are to start.... for if you are not happy now where you are then it won't matter where you go or who you meet... you still won't be happy...

so perk up... look around... and take in the beauty of living... that is living... :biggrin:

[kyle]

no dont be yourself and be a poser everyone loves a poser :rolleyes: seriously if your self you'll either find people like you or find people who like you or your alone forever so good luck

[dee949]

Hey Telex,
I totally understand how you feel. So far, the advise that ppl are giving you about being yourself is great. But im also wondering if you went to soccer camp because you wanted to be there. Maybe your just not putting yourself in the right environment to meet ppl that you can connect with? I could be wrong, but thats just a suggestion. :wink:

[Breegalad]

Ill i gotta say is this:
for 3 years i was a stuck up little bitch and i didnt even know it.(not saying your a bitch.. sorry if that comes across...)i thought i was being myself. i kept fealin' left out and invisable. I just stoped trying... i let myself drift away from anyone who would ever accept me. eventualy i started hangin' out with people who didnt give a shit about anything really. It taought me to stop bein' up tight and indefferent. i did what i was comfotable doing and i stoped carin' what people thought about me. I mean, who are they to judge you if they've never lived im your shoes!

and telex, tho ive never met you i think you and i could really get along. :ponder: we should talk sometime, it'd be cool :cool:

[TelexII]

Wow! I'm surprised I got a lot of responses! :smile: I guess I just confused my self here. I've noticed some major conflicts happing to the people that have been here longer than me I kinda felt lost and tried to find a place to keep up with everyone. Just curious what has happend that got everyones attention??? :confused:

[NOREGRETS]

see how efficiently you blend in ... :cool: its as simple as that ..

I think everyone responded cos many has been in the same page as yours once .... and they are proud that they survived that state ... Hope you will do the same soon :smile:

[Sharker]

Yea, bring in mind, your never the only one ^.^ Everyone has basically experienced things before you, thats why its good to have the net, ask other people for answers (specially for school work :biggrin: )

Like NOREGRETS said, you blend in fine, ^.^